Characters answering surveys: Wilhelmina Goldberg

Have you ever gotten an internet survey?  It has strange questions like your favorite foods, and flavors, that sort of thing.



Ever wondered what would happen if you had a novel character answer one of those?



I decided to have a little fun this week, so I decided to fill one of them out .... as my character Wilhelmina Goldberg -- Secret Service Agent, Tech-expert, and all around barrel of laughs.  I haven't mentioned her in a while, so she's due.



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1) Your Name: Wilhelmina Goldberg

2) Nicknames: Villie

3) City where you live?: Washington DC, when I'm there.

4) School?: Polytech

5) Parents Names?:  Mom and Dad

6) Eye color?: Hazel

7) Hair?: Whatever I decide it is

8)Pets?: Does a roomate count?

9) Siblings?: Too many

10) Best Friends: My computer. I call him Hal.  He talks like Viggo Mortensen

12) Best Enemies: Vista / Bill Gates.

13) Can you dance?: Not really

14) Saddest moment in recent memory: When Steve Jobs died



Favorite TV Shows

Comedy: Whenever Bill Gates has a press conference

Drama: Doctor Who

Reality Show: Sons of Guns

Science fiction show: "Numbers"

Favorite car show: either Top Gear, or Knightrider.



Favorite actor: Orlando Bloom



Favorite novel: Lord of the Rings



Most desired gadget: Sonic Screwdriver.



Most desired recreational toy: One I can't program, you mean?  A lightsaber. I have some people I need to negotiate with. It would come in handy



WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU CURRENTLY READING: Timothy Zahn's Star Wars novels. All of them.



WHAT CD's ARE IN YOUR PLAYER RIGHT NOW?: You mean the playlist on my I-pod?  Tom Smith.



WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?: "The Men of Lord of the Rings."  I photoshopped it myself



FAVORITE BOARD GAME?: Boards? They used boards before computers? Leave me alone, I have Warhammer.



FAVORITE MAGAZINES: Security Magazine



FAVORITE SMELLS?: A warm hard drive



BEST FEELING IN THE WORLD?:  Showing up at a new place .



WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD?: Being ordered to fortify the security of someone who won't listen to a damn thing I say.  I'm looking at you, Saudi Ambassador.



ROLLER COASTER SCARY OR EXCITING?: I can't bring my laptop on board. They suck.



HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE?: I don't do rings. I program the tunes to various themes of Lord of the Rings, Star Trek, Star Wars, and Babylon 5, usually depending on who it is.  Sometimes I'll let it go to voicemail so I can listen to the whole tune...



FUTURE CHILD' NAME? Sean Luke, and Arwyn.

DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE FAST? I grew up in New York, I don't drive, really.



DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL? My harddrive



STORMS - COOL OR SCARY? They screw up my Wifi!!!



WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CAR? : The C train, if you want to be picky



IF YOU COULD MEET ONE PERSON DEAD OR ALIVE:  Stephen Hawking. He needs a good talking to.



FAVORITE DRINK? Slivovitz



EVER BEEN IN LOVE?: Yes, but David Tennant isn't taking my calls.

WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED? My go-bags



FAVORITE COLOR CLOTHES TO WEAR:  Black. Makes my job easier.



Do you believe in Heaven/Hell: I've been to Hell on assignment. There is lots of sand there.



Who is the person(s) you despise most?: Bill Gates

What is your computer desk made of? I don't need desks. I have a lap.

What did you do last night?: Rewrote Windows 7. Now it runs more like a Mac.

Dream car?: Kitt, only fully wired with voice commands and net access.

Have you ever won any special awards?: Yes. But the NSA won't let me have them back.

Fast or slow?: Faster the better, because they're usually shooting at me.

DADT, Gay Marriage: Who cares?

Last week wasn't very good as far as blog posts went. And I'm sorry for that. This week, I've got three posts already written.  This one is considered "timely," as my Examiner.com editors like to say.



A while ago, I wrote an article about gay marriage in New York.  It was entitled: Gay Marriage, so what?  I suspect you can guess what my general conclusions were.



I collect all sorts of weird articles, and magazines.  On the one hand, I could read Guns and Ammo, then the Spring catalog for a major publisher, then Time Magazine (until they went anti-Semite), the list goes on.



One such magazine is Salute, the magazine of the archdiocese for the military services, USA.



Yes, the military has their own archdiocese.



In their Summer, 2011 issue, there was a statement from Archbishop Timothy P. Broglio, the Archbishop for USA military services.

His statement was two pages long, and here's an excerpt ...

"The church is unwavering in her commitment to the pastoral care of all persons in need, regardless of sexual inclination or anything else.  All people in need are served by Catholc Chaplains with zeal and passion for bringing the reality of the Risen Lord to all.  Whether Don't ask don't tell persists or not is immaterial to that bedrock principle.  The faithful .... must never forget that those with a homosexual inclination must be treated with the respect worthy of their human dignity."  [Typed by hand, any typos are mine]

In short: that's nice, we don't care if they're outed, it doesn't matter to us.



The message then cited Federal law (1 USC subection 7)... which I believe is commonly known as the defense of marriage act (DOMA).



So, "yes, you have DADT repealed. Who cares? We don't like it, but we're not going to marry gays, and you're not going to make us. We can continue, business as usual."  Everyone can move on.



Which is pretty much what I said the first time about gay marriage.



It's so nice when the Catholic Church listens to me.

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Then, on September 30th, the Pentagon issued an order allowing all military clergy to perform gay marriage ceremonies ....



The response of Broglio?  It's pretty much the same. Not to mention, there is still DOMA.  It's a federal law.  How can a federal agency allow the existence of something that, legally, does not exist at the federal level?



And, come April, 2012, what will happen when all of the gay married couples file joint income tax? The IRS cannot acknowledge them -- the IRS is a federal agency.  Accountant friends (and relative) are already saying that the IRS will not accept joint filings from any of the new marriages from New York (et al) between two men, or two women.



Not to mention .... the military has bases all over the 50 states. Gay marriage is only passed in about ... Five? (CA, VT, MA, NY, HI).  Isn't that a bit of a problem? And arguing that they are federal institutions is a problem, when you consider that, again, DOMA is federal law. State laws do not matter in this instance.



Is it just me, or did someone not think this through?



As I said the first time: I'll start to care about gay marriage when someone comes after religion in its name.



I don't care just yet. Initial reports of this story said that "military chaplains are being forced to marry homosexual couples."  I cared for about five minutes, then I looked for more footnotes.



However, now that I found that it "allowed" gay marriage, instead of "requiring" clergy to perform them, I'm back to not caring. Though the legal situation is going to be hilarious.

Characters answering surveys: Maureen McGrail.

Have you ever gotten an internet survey?  It has strange questions like your favorite foods, and flavors, that sort of thing.



Ever wondered what would happen if you had a novel character answer one of those?



I decided to have a little fun this week, so I decided to fill one of them out .... as my character Maureen McGrail -- Irish Interpol Agent, and registered lethal weapon.  I haven't mentioned her in a while, so she's due.



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1) Your Name: Maureen McGrail

2) Nicknames: None

3) City where you live?: Dublin, Ireland

4) School?: Trinity College

5) Parents Names?:  Padraig and Mary

6) Eye color?: Green

7) Hair?: Black

8)Pets?: Irish Wolfhound

9) Siblings?: None

10) Best Friends: Do colleagues count?

12) Best Enemies: Sean A.P. Ryan

13) Can you dance?: Of course I can. I call it Tai Chi, but doesn't that count?



Favorite TV Shows

Comedy: Watching the British Parliament

Drama: Deadliest Warrior

Reality Show: Reality is overrated

Science fiction show: The weather channel



Favorite actor: David Tennant



Favorite novel: Tim Pat Coogan's "The IRA." I think it's a comedy, because I've read the files on what happened. He's a joke.



WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU CURRENTLY READING: John Whitman's Black Belt Krav Maga



WHAT CD's ARE IN YOUR PLAYER RIGHT NOW?: U2



WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?: A shamrock with crosshairs on it.



FAVORITE BOARD GAME?: Chess



FAVORITE MAGAZINES: Black Belt Magazine



FAVORITE SMELLS?: Fresh air



WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD?:  See Sean Ryan show up at my crime scene



BEST FEELING IN THE WORLD?: When I see him in my rearview mirror



ROLLER COASTER SCARY OR EXCITING?: A target



HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE?: I check the voicemail later.



FUTURE CHILD' NAME? When I get someone to have kids with, I'll let you know, won't I?

DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE FAST? Not particular.



DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL? My dog isn't that fat. I sleep with him.



STORMS - COOL OR SCARY? We don't get many where I live.



WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CAR? : Porche ... it was a loaner.



IF YOU COULD MEET ONE PERSON DEAD OR ALIVE:  Can't this question be: "If there's someone you never want to meet again, who would it be?"



FAVORITE DRINK? Guiness



EVER BEEN IN LOVE?: Yes

WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED? My go-bag



FAVORITE COLOR CLOTHES TO WEAR:  Dark green. Best for camouflage



Do you believe in Heaven/Hell: I'm in Ireland. I live in Heaven.



Who is the person(s) you despise most?: Sean A.P Ryan

What is your computer desk made of? I'm not allowed a desk. I'm not at the office that often.

What did you do last night?: Broke up a drug lord's penthouse.

Dream car?: A private plane.

Have you ever won any special awards?: Yes. Mostly martial arts awards.

Fast or slow?: Fast and low

Music blog: Tom Smith; Cheap Cyborg, Fake it better, Granito.

It's the columbus day weekend.  Most people don't show up on the blog on long weekends.



However, for those of you who have shown up, some music....



First, ever wonder what would happen in the future? Ever consider that technology would enable you to have laser beams and stuff?  Well, the future is here ... what happened?

One Mr. Rob Granito is a liar, a thief, and an art forger -- only what he does is steal other people's comic book artwork and claim it as his own.

This song is rated R for language -- the only language strong enough to adequately describe the little punk.

Music Blog: John Williams marches

I figured that this was going to be one of two items today: another character filling in another survey, or a music blog.

You're in luck: music.

First: the march of the Wedding Party at one of my friend's wedding last year .....

The theme to Superman....

Mainly because his wife forbade Star Wars. Otherwise, it would have been the Imperial March




And, speaking of Star Wars ...

Characters answering surveys: Manana Shushurin

Resume of

Manana Shushurin

Have you ever gotten an internet survey?  It has strange questions like your favorite foods, and flavors, that sort of thing.



Ever wondered what would happen if you had a novel character answer one of those?



I decided to have a little fun this week, so I decided to fill one of them out .... as my character Manana Shushurin, German spy, breathtaking beauty, and possible assassin.



I don't talk about her as much as I do the others, mainly because I don't want to try luring people to my site with photos of beautiful women.



But, I figured, now would be a good time to talk a little more about her.

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1) Your Name: Manana Shushurin

2) Nicknames: Mani

3) City where you live?: Berlin, German.

4) School?: Wittenburg university. Degrees in philosophy, history, and political science.

5) Parents Names?:  Iosef and Andrea

6) Eye color?: Hazel

7) Hair?: Brunette

8)Pets?: Goldfish

9) Siblings?: Mikhail

10) Best Friends: Do colleagues count?

12) Best Enemies: See #5 and #9

13) Can you dance?: Yes. Usually with training partners.



Favorite TV Shows

Comedy: Tinker Tailor Solider Spy (tv miniseries)

Drama: The Avengers

Reality Show: Get Smart (too many old American reruns in Germany)



Favorite actor: Any American president. I've read their files.



Favorite novel: Every Spy a Prince. (I've read too many intel reports to consider that a historical work)



WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU CURRENTLY READING: Michael Dibdin's "Aurelio Zen" mystery series.



WHAT CD's ARE IN YOUR PLAYER RIGHT NOW?: E Nomine's Vater Unser..



WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?: BND symbol



FAVORITE BOARD GAME?: Risk



FAVORITE MAGAZINES: SWAT Magazine



FAVORITE SMELLS?: Pipe smoke.



WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD?: When someone who should love you actually hates you.



BEST FEELING IN THE WORLD?: When I kill him.



ROLLER COASTER SCARY OR EXCITING?: Relaxing



HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE?: Depends how fast I can check caller ID



FUTURE CHILD' NAME? Never thought of it

DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE FAST? I grew up on the autobahn. Slow is not an option.



DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL? Yes. It hides my gun.



STORMS - COOL OR SCARY? Sounds to go to sleep to.



WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CAR? : Mercedes



IF YOU COULD MEET ONE PERSON DEAD OR ALIVE:  Only two. They are alive. They won't be after I meet them.



FAVORITE DRINK? Lager



EVER BEEN IN LOVE?: no

WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED? Things the ATF is afraid of



FAVORITE COLOR CLOTHES TO WEAR:  black



Do you believe in Heaven/Hell: I live in what used to be East Germany. I believe in Hell.



Who is the person(s) you despise most?: See #5 and #9

What is your computer desk made of? A cheap wood impersonation.

What did you do last night?: Slept on my office couch.

Dream car?: Panzer

Have you ever won any special awards?: Yes, but I can't tell you about any of them.

Fast or slow?: Fast, you're a harder target then

Sex, DC Comics, and ... wtf?

Long term readers know my opinion on sex in writing.  I'd say my opinion on sex in general is very Catholic, but since no one understand that, I'm not even going to bother.



However, I can sum up my thoughts on sex in fiction very easily: who needs it?



As Rebekah says, we all know the mechanics. What possible reason is there for a blow by blow description? Pardon the pun, but you know what I mean.



Since my first article on sex, I've written a few sex scenes .... by few I mean two, and they were in the same book.  However, the "sex scene" was in someone's dream, and the protagonist was having a conversation with his dead wife through most of it. The sex was incidental, and mostly has to do with the fact that she was killed on their honeymoon.  The second sex scene was so vague, any less detail would be as clear as a Salvatore Dali painting, only with words.

Yes, I brought in Dali to an article on sex. I'm weird. However, there is a point.

Even during these scenes, there's no blow by blow description. (I'm going to stop apologizing for that phrase, just roll with it.).  It's not necessary, unless someone's writing porn.  Even something as intimate as noticing a tattoo on someone during sex doesn't necessitate that much detail -- the audience does not need to know what specific act the individual was doing when s/he noticed the tattoo.  It's sex. Nudity happens.  Next chapter.

So, what prompted today's rant?

DC Comics seems to be going back to the 1990s, where the artistic style was summarized by my friend Jason as "Big boobs, big guns."

The current version seems to focus on women and sexuality, with an overemphasis on the sex.

I've no problem with sexuality, or with women -- look at my model for Manana Shushurin if you don't believe me --  it's that it's bad writing.

Starfire, in costume

Take, for example, the character of Starfire.  She's an alien with red hair, green eyes (and I don't mean with two green irises, I mean the entire eye is green), orange skin, with measurements somewhere in the 36 DD battery range.

Normally, I would stop reading at green-eyed redhead (I grew up with a crush on the female lead in Riverdance, leave me alone).  The character has always been sexually relaxed, it was mostly a cultural thing.  And, for the most part, it was used properly -- as comedy.  For example, in the classic Crisis on Infinite Earths, Starfire walks in with Nightwing, meets an old friend, and introduces him as "This is Nightwing, my lover."

Nightwing's reaction is such that you suspect he's glad that he has to go and face the end of the world.

And that was it.  One panel. Move on.

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